4 mins Read

13 Types Of Exes – Which One Is Yours / Which One Are You?

June 30, 2019

What’s popping people!!!!!

How are y’all doing?. Today my gist cap is on and from the topic, you know what we’re here for. EXes!!!! Yes! No doubt some of you reading this would have a story or must have heard a story about Exes.

Before finally settling down with your ‘life partner’, it’s pretty normal to have fun and enjoy the dating world (although some aren’t totally fun). Some people go through a smooth break up, some terrible while others have not-so-bad breakup but usually, the common ground is that there are usually lesson(s) to be learned from these relationships.

So today, based on my experience and that of some people I know, I’ll be telling you about types of exes, lol, and probably lessons they taught us.

1. The One That Got Away: Whenever you think of this ex, with no strings attached, you just can’t help but wonder what life would have been like if you two were still together. It was a happy relationship, he had all the right qualities you wanted but the timing just wasn’t right. This one prolly taught you that you can love a person 100% but love isn’t all that makes a successful relationship

2. The Social media stalker: This kind of ex is a lurker, never says “hi”, doesn’t talk to you AT ALL but is sure to be among the first 3 people to view your posts on social media… and you’re like dudeeeee (refers to male or female).. leave me the heck alone. But on the flip side..lol it’s good to see that someone is interested in how your life is going (ps: could still be dangerous)

3. Calendar Alert Ex: This one!…can double as a google calendar reminder. The only time you’d probably hear from this ex in the whole year is 12 midnight on your birthday. For some reasons, this ex can’t just forget your birthday, worse, can’t overcome the temptation not to say “happy birthday” every year. With this one in your life, you can’t forget a birthday.

4. Best Friends Forever: The one thing that would always be impossible in your relationship with this ex is romantic chemistry. And even if the relationship ended on a bad note, both of you just couldn’t hate each other. The question both of you ask yourselves is why you ever dated in the first place. The relationship was damn awkward or messy until you broke it off and became just friends. Now you have a very platonic kind of love for this person, you can gist with this person and even hang out sometimes. This Ex simply taught you that some relationships might not work out for some reasons but you can be great friends.

5. The One You’re Ashamed To Call Your Ex:  This one, makes you lie and say “no” when asked if you dated. Presently you think of him/her and ask yourself “how did I date someone like this”. It’s worse when you remember the times you kissed or did something more with this person. hahaha. This is an embarrassing ex. This one was probably an eye-opener for you and taught you what you don’t want in your life.

6. The One Who Ghosted you: *inserts we don’t talk anymore by Charlie Puth*. lol. Thos ex never gave the opportunity to talk or be friends after the breakup. After the break up happened, the next course of action he/she took was to delete you off WhatsApp, block you on every social media, cut off mutual friends and does EVERY DAMN THING POSSIBLE to make sure you never meet in present or future. This relationship most likely ended in a bad way and it’s the person’s way to move on. Haha.

7. The Rebound: This ex, you see makes you a rebound whenever they are in between relationships. When in a relationship, you wouldn’t hear from them but once they are single, they come back texting you for whatever reason(s). When you get a message from this person you can be 99.9% sure he/she is single again.

8. The Analyzer: You are on speaking terms, probably a good one with this ex but the topics of his discussion most times are ‘what went wrong?” or relationship advice for future relationships. This ex can be pretty annoying because you have moved on and don’t even want to speak about the relationship but you still do it anyway because you feel it’s a way to help him/her have a better relationship with another person.

9. The One Who Moved On WELL: If you are single (and desperately searching), this Ex can be intimidating to you. This ex is happily with another person. LMAO, it could be worse if this ex is married now. You really may not feel anything for this person, you shouldn’t actually, haha. don’t be a home wrecker.

1o. The “Begger”: This Ex wouldn’t just move on. Very sad, sometimes annoying because they wouldn’t stop begging for a second chance saying stuff like ” you’re the ONLY one he (or she) would ever love. It’s safe to call this person a one-sided soulmate. But really, the best thing you could have done for this person was to end the relationship because you just weren’t the same way anymore and it couldn’t be forced.

11. Inconsistent Ex: First off, if you had an undefined relationship with a person, can we still categorize this person as an ex? well, maybe. I don’t know the exact word to use to describe this Ex but let me explain. You see this person, the relationship just dissolved without any formal ending. Like… you just realized you weren’t ‘dating’ anymore. what this person does now is to just appear out of space when it’s really convenient, says “hi”, probably even suggests you hang out and then suddenly disappears before the day. Sooo unserious.

12. Dramatic one: This particular ex is real-time crazy, lol, always causing drama, bringing up stories of what happened while you dated or what caused the breakup whenever you meet. This one could make you fear for your life sometimes because he/she somehow always shows up where you are (because he FOLLOWS you around intentionally) and causes a scene.

13. The One YOU Damaged: In this relationship, you were the “bad” person. You broke this Ex’s heart and it was unjustifiable. You most likely don’t talk to this Ex anymore because I mean… what would you say? lol Just live with the guilt forever. hahahaha!


Yep, that brings us to the end of this post. Is your type of Ex among the ones i listed? Are you any of these kind of Ex,lol?

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I'm Mimiejay, I blog about what I blog about.💜